life of leisure...stinks

It was just last week that I was dusting the stairway with my fluffy extendable duster and thinking to myself "my life is pretty sweet".  The house was coming together.  I had even cleaned out some of the air ducts and organized the mud room, things were getting crossed off my list.  I was walking the dogs a couple of times a day and enjoying the sunshine, fresh air, quiet and exercise.  I was visiting with the neighbors, I was working on my calling, reading the scriptures, keeping up with the laundry, getting along great with R and feeling happy and energetic in the afternoons taking the kids from place to place and making dinners that they didn't want to eat but that were tasty.  I was visiting teaching and thinking about having a hobby.  Honestly it is so much better not to work. I was telling Becky that when I worked it consumed my day and then the rest of the time was burdened with chores and it was exhausting, I really feel like I am a better mother when I don't work.  I should have known better...

Grace walking Z this morning, she thinks fall is here and Z hates her snowsuit.

The last 4 days I have been stuck in bed with horrible back pain.  I have been to the chiropractor twice, gotten xrays and have an MRI scheduled later in the week.  We are hoping that I have a bulging disk and nothing worse.  Will know more at the end of the week. I miss my burdens and want them back.  I am getting better, I think, it's been slow, much slower than I want.  Now when I am laying down and drugged up I am mostly without terrible pain, which is a sad improvement from the first days.  I am sure it will get better soon.  Thankfully Nana flew down to help.  Rob and the children tried but really were not keeping up.  I noticed a real difference as soon as she came in the house, having a mom up and running things is a blessing and joy in a home.  There is cheerful chatter, meals cooked and things being looked after.  It is a huge weight off Rob's shoulders and mind as he was so worried and also off of mine.  Grandparents are such a blessing to families.  I really wish (here we go again I know) that we lived closer to family.  I miss my children getting to have regurlar contact with their grandparents and I miss being a good influence, helping presense in Penny and Tate's life.  Well, it is what it is and it's our job to cheerfully make the best of it.  So we are grateful when we are together.

Penny and Tate at a birthday party for their cousin last night.  So cute!

I've been thinking lately of the blessings I enjoy.  Laying in bed gives you lots of thinking time.  So a list:

• the stars, I love looking up and seeing them bright and shiny on a clear night.  First thing in the morning too when I take the dogs out I sit on the bottom step and let them do their business and I always look up and find my favorite ones.  It's so beautiful.
• cell phones, I am so happy to be in touch with my sisters and girls and Rob through out the day.  Val and I talk every day, which is so great. I love getting updates for Si, J and D about their lives and what's going on.  Jenna and Clayton are super busy with a packed schedule, they are happy. Dani is all unpacked in her new home.  She's a hard worker! She made a friend already with three little kids named:...ready for this?  Bear, Phoenix and Lion.  How do you not feel silly yelling out in the back yard Bear! Lion! stop fighting!! ?
• Fishing, Rob and Grace love to fish together.  I am so happy that they have a great activity to do. Sometimes it's annoying when it feel like he's fished a super a lot, but mostly I am glad for it and the fish he brings home is yummy!
• glasses, I can read so much easier with them on :)
• the Lord's gentle tutoring.  The last few blessings I have gotten have been interesting.  When we were set apart as a young women's presidency the Stake President had us all come and talked with us for quite awhile before hand.  He counseled us not to murmur, counseled at great length.  I thought that was interesting as I didn't consider myself a murmurer, or the other sisters.  However there have been times when I have had to bite my tongue and times when I should have and did not.  So don't murmur.  Important.  Then last week when I got a blessing for my back I was told, as I knew, that the experiences of our life are to teach us lessons and that I would learn about humility.  Again a surprise because I didn't think I was particularly not humble.  I have been studying humility and trying to learn it better.  I am glad for corrections and opportunities to grow and be more like the Savior.
• a comfy mattress.  We've been spending lots of time together my mattress and I and even though it's pretty ghetto and has duck tape on the sides it's still comfortable and big with room for lots of peeps.