Tuesday, February 26, 2019

Things

Why does Grace use our car as an auxiliary closet? I always find shoes, socks, hair brushes and everything else you can think of in the car. 

Cat loves the color red, and water. He regularly goes out to the pool and plays in the water. He also plays in the sink and joins family members in the shower. Weird cat.

I’m subbing seniors today. They are doing busy work. Our education system is a bit of a mess. Kids don’t learn enough, and they don’t learn a lot of the things that they should. I don’t know who’s fault it is...not in the interest of placing blame but in the pursuit of a solution. Like most things I think it comes down to the family. A lot of learning should be taking place at home. I hear some people complain that the schools don’t teach budgeting, how to do taxes, how to get a job, how to be nice to others. That clearly falls in the family sphere of responsibility. I hear many complaints about time wasted at school and this is true. Again it stems back to the home. If kids came to school ready to learn, knowing how to walk in the hall nicely. Knowing how to sit and listen. How to engage in meaningful dialogue, ect,  teachers wouldn’t have to spend so much time disciplining, finding stuff, shushing students. No teacher dreams of spending their day dealing with unruly kids, unsupportive parents and restrictive policies. They do dream of engaging lessons, excited students, cooperative learning, hands on experiences and joyful learning. 

Families should live close to each other. There it is. I would love to live near Nana and Abba, to cousins and grandparents. To my siblings and nieces and nephews. My grandchildren. My adult kids. I would love to be there to support and love and celebrate and even to struggle and be in each other’s way. If someone has a birthday it should be easy to get together for cake and ice cream. If someone is sick it should be easy to take their kids home for dinner and playing and homework. If someone is giving a talk in church we should be able to go. 

Eberly, Belle’s service dog, is sometimes treated meanly at school. What is wrong with people? I also saw a picture today of a mother elephant with her calf and people were throwing fireworks at them. What the heck?? (and that’s not the word that plays in my head) How can people be so mean?
It is unbelievable. 

Rob is having a lot of work stress. No bueno. 

The weather is nice this week. In the 70’s.

On the drive to school today I talked to Ethan about pornography. Just randomly. Often we listen to the radio. Sometimes we drive quietly. But occasionally I take advantage of the fact that he (or one of his sisters depending) is trapped and just share a random message. The thing about pornography is I think it’s so pervasive. I don’t really think there is anyone who hasn’t seen it at least in passing. I have. I really believe if I have so has everyone. So we have to have conversations about it. We have to know what to do to protect our minds and hearts. 
I clearly remember the first time I saw it. It was in the 70’s, way before the internet and during the era of the “love boat” as pretty steamy stuff.  My family had gone to spend the day with the Anderson’s in North Edwards. There is nothing to do there...like really, truly nothing. We both had large families and they had a smallish home. With 2 sets of parents and Grandma Anderson visiting in the kitchen/ living room and a multitude of younger siblings playing noisily in the house Julie and I went outside. We mainly walked up and down the street talking. Meanwhile Alec and Loren were also sent out (no doubt because they were breaking something inside!) Their play was much more the running around, throwing rocks, variety of kid play.  Eventually Julie and I noticed that the boys were looking at something in the desert. Something that kept their attention and elicited some loud laughter. The kind the alerts the observant that something out of the ordinary is going on. Bring the diligent (nosy and bossy) big sisters that we were we went to investigate. They had found a magazine. Curious we glanced (the girls) the boys studied at the pages. It took just a minute for us to really recognize that this was not good. We lovingly (there may have been some shouting and punching) told our brothers that they, and we, had to stop and we had to get rid of it so no one else would see it.  They agreed (sort of) and a little grabbing of pages later and pious lecturing (by us) and indignant and reluctant handing over (by them) we had a plan. The boys dug a hole. We buried the offending magazine and then stood guard until our brothers found something else to do. 
And many decades later I still remember. That is the insidious nature of pornography. 
I was lucky because it was several years until I saw it again. This time shown to me and Alec and our cousins by our uncle. 
Today it doesn’t take someone showing you, or randomly seeing it in the desert. Kids can and do see it in their devices, on accident, and on purpose, and as easily as can be. Do they know what to do? Do they understand the harm is does? 

Every day I have to make dinner. I am out of ideas. I do feel joy when I see our cupboards full of food, and when a hot dinner is placed in front of my family. I also recognizably feel joyful when I put away clean laundry. I am happy my kids have what they need. That their clothes smell good and that they can look neat and tidy.  It is both a wonderful and an awful time to be alive.

The twins birthday is coming up! I can’t wait to visit. We have a lot of fun stuff coming up: spring break trip to the keys, twins bday trip, Jenna and Emma and Tori visit in April. Good stuff!!

I love all the wildlife we get to see. Sunday morning on my walk with Ziva we saw an otter slide off the bank and into the water. We saw two hawks circling overhead and one dove into the water and came up with a fish. We saw squirrels, a blue jay, a sand hill crane, cattle egrets, a great egret and those little black duck like guys with long necks. I need to look up what they are. I saw an armadillo on the drive to church and Rob and Grace saw a crocodile and lots of birds on their afternoon bike ride. We always report to each other what we see.

Andrea is still recovering with some complications. I pray that she feels great soon.

Every.single.day Grace begs for a service dog. 

Also every day cat catches and rips apart a lizard or two in the house. 

I think I might make cookies when I get home. I need to go heart attack one of our YW this afternoon and invite her to the temple tomorrow so a batch of cookies ought to help sweeten the deal!

My friend posted a thoughtful post about abortion on fb. Asking for people to politely share their perspectives. No replying was allowed. It was very interesting to read the thread. It is such a complex issue. Personally I think it’s wrong. I believe life starts at conception and that it is devine in nature. I can’t imagine a scenario where I would choose that and I have been in a couple that others would have felt justified in that choice. I was a teen mom. I never considered it. I was told by doctors when expecting Jenna that some of the cancer treatment I had just prior, or just as (hard to know) she was conceived could have caused damage. I didn’t consider it.  That being said I know there are some rare exceptions when maybe it is okay. I don’t think we should legislate morality. God’s law trumps man’s. So should doctors and prayerful, thoughtful, educated women have the possibility of an abortion taken completely away from them? I don’t think so. Am I pro choice? No. Not really. 
Again if our families were teaching God’s laws and the people were living them that would fix the problem. Making a law doesn’t fix problems. I don’t think women should have abortions 98% of the time, but when it’s needed I think the law should not stop it. How’s that for a middle of the road, run over by a Mac truck position?
I guess I have a distrust of law makers. They don’t represent my beliefs. They don’t stand up for what is right. So that’s sad and hard. They need to do better. And we need to do better with who we elect and how we make our voices heard. 
*They can decide the speed limit. And to get rid of day light savings if they want. 





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